I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you. -Psalm 119:11
By Yodit Kifle
I woke up this morning to a text by my dear friend in which she wrote, “You have entered the other side. Happy Valentine’s Day *insert laughing face * “
I chuckled and wrote back that I couldn’t wait til tomorrow to get half off on candies and flowers! (I mean, come on, let’s be real lol)
I thought about her text and I thought about the fact that yes, I am in a relationship. Yes, I do get to share this day with someone special (well, it’s long distance) and yes, it does feel good!
However, I thought about how this man made day can really amplify the emotions within us that deeply desire companionship….the desire to experience love with someone who loves us back. And there is nothing wrong with that desire because I believe it’s God-given. I just believe that if not guarded, the enemy can use this day to plant the fear of whether that experience will ever come or discontentment of it having not come. And they are real. I’ve felt them before.
But here’s what I’ve learned being in a relationship. The reality is that love is so romanticized in our world as if it’s perfect people experiencing perfect love. And that often leads people to making decisions based on the idea of love verses the commitment of love.
The idea of love says that you just want the highs of feeling the butterflies. Being noticed and adored. Thinking that your relationship will always be like those Instagram pictures where the guy is tightly hugging the girl and the hashtag #relationshipgoals is posted.
The commitment of love shows how prideful, selfish, fearful we as human beings can be and yet still commit to walking through that in humility by relying on God for the grace and wisdom of what it means to put one another first.
You see, if you aren’t willing to be exposed of your flaws, you aren’t ready for a relationship. If you aren’t willing to be refined from pride, selfishness, insecurity, expectations and so much more, it will be a hard road.
Yes—those highs will be there. Those butterflies will visit, but just as quickly as they came, they will vanish. So what will you be found standing on?
If God and the message of the Gospel isn’t at the center, the top, the middle, the left, the right, inside, outside, and everywhere in your relationship, I am telling you, it won’t last!
So, what am I saying?
Be found rooted deeply and grounded in the love of Christ. Let Him dwell richly in you. (Ephesians 3: 17)Let your security and identity be found only in Him. Let Him lead you in making this kind of commitment in His time.
Don’t beat yourself up for desiring what God delights in. But don’t be so consumed by it that you forget that He delights in you and we are called to delight in Him.
Happy Valentine’s Day to you ladies! LOVE in its purest form is beautiful and thank God that Jesus is just that for us! He's Perfect. Committed. Without Pride. Without Fear. Without an Agenda. He is LOVE.
May we be found in Him.